Monday, November 30, 2015

Monday

(Youssif Omar is another peace loving Muslim.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady took me to a restaurant.  We ate tortured shrimp for dinner.  The poor little beasts were peeled alive.  In fact, they were still jumping on the plate as they were brought to our table.  After that, the smiling waitress snipped their tiny heads off with a pair of scissors.  The heads were fried, and the bodies were eaten raw.  Tortured shrimp is surprisingly tasty.

I watched the UFC.  The event was held in Seoul, but I didn't attend in person.  The tickets were quite pricey, and I'm a broke dead dick.  So I had to be content viewing the action from home.  Benson Henderson was featured in the main event.  He won a split decision over his opponent.  However, I found his performance to be quite lackluster. Benson's a bit out sized at 170 pounds.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I was attacked by a very large feral cat.  Former UFC light heavyweight champion Jon "Bones" Jones saved my life by shooting the crazy animal in the head.  His girlfriend then offered to have sex with me.  Being a gentleman, I refused on principle.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of coffee.  Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  Korea's jails are getting a little crowed.  Therefore, the powers-that-be will start granting more early releases for non-violent offenders.  A lot of business men are currently in the slammer.  The peninsula seems to be filled with white-collar corruption.

I turned on my laptop.  A man named Youssif Omar works at the University of Missouri as a graduate assistant.  He saw his fourteen-year-old niece walking around her high school without a head-scarf.  Mr. Omar went nuts.  He grabbed the girl by the hair and dragged her down a flight of stairs.  This story certainly isn't a big surprise.  Water is wet, and Muslims are crazy. Mark my words. Islam will end up being the death of us all.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's In the Navy by The Village People.  God bless. 

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Sunday

(Robert Dear Jr. needs to beg for forgiveness.)

Yesterday, I took the Dragon Lady to Costco.  Driving in metropolitan Korea is truly the pits.  These people are some of the worst motorists in the universe.  Lots of people on the peninsula die in car accidents.  If I were king of the world, I'd take away their automobiles and force them to ride horses.  Yes.  They are truly bad.

We bought three hundred and fifty dollars worth of groceries.  That sounds like a lot.  But we buy everything in bulk.  The food should last us for two weeks.  We usually spend about eight hundred a month. That's not bad for a family of four.

I watched the latest episode of The Ultimate Fighter.  It's the most compelling show on television.  My favorite contestant Ryan the Wizard got eliminated by Saul.  Ryan got the bigger man to the ground several times.  But he just didn't have the strength to impose his will while they were grappling.  Nevertheless, I hope to see him in the future.  His ju-jitsu is outstanding.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy nihilist.  I believe in the infallible Bible.  And I try to read scripture every day. Nevertheless, I'm still a negative son-of-a-bitch with a shitload of problems.  But I have faith that Jesus will snatch me from the jaws of death.  He's that powerful. The Savior's the best boss that anyone could hope for. Amen.

I went to bed at 11 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I walked to Vietnam to purchase cheap cigarettes.  I've never been to Vietnam.  But nicotine is an endless temptation.  I miss tobacco dearly.

I turned on CNN.  Three people were killed at an abortion clinic in Colorado Springs.  The assassin is a loony bird named Robert Dear Jr.  The mainstream media hates Christianity.  This act of violence will now give them an excuse to compare my religion with Islam. Christians might even be accused of supporting domestic terrorism.  Mr. Dear has done us all a great disservice.  He should get on his knees and beg for forgiveness.

I read the paper later in the day.  A clinic in Seoul was recycling hypodermic needles.  Consequently, roughly fifty people have tested positive for Hepatitis C.  This illness savagely attacks the liver and can cause death prematurely. 

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Disco Inferno by The Tramps.  God bless.   

Friday, November 27, 2015

Friday

(Let's behead Ronald Pritchett.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady took me to a restaurant.  She purchased fifteen dollars worth of fried chicken.  She also bought me a pitcher of Cass beer.  The poultry and suds tasted great.  Overall, the meal was a nice experience.  But near the end, she started to bitch and bitch and bitch.  To be honest, I can't remember what she was complaining about.  I can't be bothered listening to her endless gripes.  Maybe that's the reason she hates me.

I watched an episode of Fargo.  A butcher's wife inadvertently kills a gangster with her car.  Her and her unfortunate husband are now trying to cover up the mess.  The butcher uses a grinder to dispose of the corpse.  However, the crime family soon learns what happened to their colleague.  Fargo is a great series.  It has my highest recommendation.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy pagan.  I asked Jesus for peace and contentment.  My family's one of the loudest on earth.  Sometimes, I wear earphones just so I don't have to hear them.  The drama never ends.  For instance, my sons are the only Asians on the planet who suck at math.  So I have to listen to their crazy mother scream and scream and scream.  Perhaps I should start drinking again.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of freshly brewed coffee.  Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  Pornography's against the law in South Korea.  All the naughty sites have been blocked.  However, some believe that this is a violation of civil liberties.  I stay out of local affairs.  Korea's a fledgling democracy, and the last thing I need is to end up in jail.  If Madame President says pornography is sinful, then I stand behind her 100%.

I turned on my laptop.  A 32-year-old man named Ronald Pritchett killed his father with a knife because the old geezer didn't buy him food from Burger King.  He also knifed his mother, but the poor woman managed to survive. Talk about a hair-trigger temper. Society would be better served if Mr. Pritchett were marched to the town square and promptly beheaded.  I feel sorry for the unlucky bastard who gets him as a cellmate.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Walk Away by The James Gang.  God bless. 

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Thursday

(Derek Medina posted Jennifer Alonso's corpse on Facebook.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady prepared beef and French fries for dinner.  The meal was pretty good.  I warmed up the fries in my Phillip's air-fryer.  They came out all hot and crisp and salty.  Then I washed the vittles down with several glasses of genuine Coca-Cola. I was in heaven.

I watched the latest episode of American Horror Story.  It turns out that Rudy Valentino is also a vampire.  He previously had a torrid romance with Lady Gaga.  However, Gaga's jealous husband locked poor Rudy in the hotel using an inch-thick steel barrier.  The angry Nosferatu managed to escape.  So now he's hunting innocent victims wherever he can find them.  He slits their throats and greedily drinks their blood.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I thanked Jesus for the gift of warmth.  The weather's been quite chilly.  However, my Soviet-style concrete apartment is nice and toasty.  I feel like a million dollars every time I relax under my blankets.  I love my bed.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I was living in China and smoking lots of cigarettes.  I was shocked at how cheap the tobacco was.  I felt very free.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank some coffee.  Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  Korea is one of the most xenophobic countries in the world.  They hate most foreigners. However, the nation's becoming more multicultural because poor farmers are marrying non-Koreans and making babies.  So now the government's doing its best to integrate these children into society.

I turned on CNN.  I'm starting to actually enjoy the channel more and more these days.  A man named Derek Medina murdered his wife.  Her name was Jennifer Alonso, and he posted her corpse on Facebook.  Derek claimed that his wife abused him.  But the jury didn't care.  They found him guilty of second-degree murder.  He'll be going away for a long long time.  He should have just divorced her.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's ETI by Blue Oyster Cult.  God bless.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Wednesday

(Jason Van Dyke was indicted for first-degree murder.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady prepared salmon and French fries for dinner.  The meal wasn't very good.  My wife's a busy woman, and her cooking lacks soul.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles with a smile on my face and a song in my heart.  I'm wonderful that way.  I washed the food down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched The Walking Dead.  The entire episode was a flashback about the black guy who uses a fighting stick to save lives.  It turns out that he was formerly a crazed killer preying on the innocent.  Luckily, he meets a forensic psychiatrist who shows him the error of his ways.  The doctor manages to turn him into a peaceful flower child.  But this pacifist is quickly becoming a thorn in the side of Rick and his crew.  After all, the last thing one needs during a zombie apocalypse is a sidekick who's a sensitive poet.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I asked Jesus to make me a better man.  My wife and children often claim that I'm a negative son-of-a-bitch.  So I want to become more positive in my speech and actions.  I believe that change is possible.  I'm a work in progress.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  There's a rally in Seoul scheduled for December 5th.  However, the police say that they might deny the protesters their right to peacefully assemble.  The president's uncomfortable with free speech.  Her daddy used to be a former military strong man who ruled the peninsula for nearly two decades.  To be honest, I'm not sure if South Korea's actually a democracy.  Therefore, I had better keep my mouth shut.  God bless the president.  Wink, wink.

I turned on my laptop.  A young man in Chicago named Laquan McDonald got stoned on PCP and started breaking into cars while wielding a knife.  A 37-year-old cop named Jason Van Dyke arrived on the scene and killed the criminal with his revolver.  Van Dyke has now been indicted for first-degree murder.  I just don't get it.  Looks like Shakespeare was correct.  Fair is foul, and foul is fair.  America is well on her way to becoming a crime-ridden third-world cesspool.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Cotton Fields by CCR.  God bless.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Tuesday

(Let's behead Larry Taylor and Jalen Watson.)

Yesteday, the Dragon Lady made salmon and rice for dinner.  The meal wasn't very good.  Quite frankly, her cooking lacks soul.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles like a happy young retarded child.  I'm wonderful that way.  My wife often tells me that I'm a negative son-of-a-bitch.  So I'm doing my best to become an optimist.  Wish me luck. 

I watched the UFC.  It's one of my greatest pleasures in life. The best match of the evening featured Neil Magny vs. Kelvin Gastelum.  Magny easily dominated the first three rounds with his superior grappling skills.  But his gas tank ran out in the fourth.  Gastelum knocked him down several times with powerful shots to the head.  However, Neil managed to garner a split-decision by avoiding the knock-out.

(Neil Magny punches Kelvin Gastelum in the face.)

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I asked Jesus to help my wife.  The poor woman cleans and cleans and cleans.  She was up till one in the morning completing the non-existent laundry.  She constantly makes work for herself.  I ought to have her admitted to a nuthouse.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I was trapped in a cage with my family on a large farm.  There were lions and tigers scattered about the grounds.  The animals were very hungry.  I told Ted Danson that I was going to kill the beasts for the sake of safety.  He agreed.

I woke up at 6 a.m.  I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  Korean parents are having a tough time getting their children into quality kindergartens and pre-schools.  The waiting lists are a mile long.  Korean mothers tend to take education a little too seriously.  Many Asian women are high-strung mental cases. That's why many Asian men drink large amounts alcohol to relieve their stress.

I turned on my laptop.  Two men named Larry Taylor and Jalen Watson were arrested for murdering Amanda Blackburn--a pregnant pastor's wife.  Pastor Blackburn has decided to forgive the two men.  Nevertheless, these villains should be dragged through the town square and promptly beheaded.  They have no reason to live.  Furthermore, I don't hear Al Sharpton or the Black Lives Matter brigade protesting this killing.  Bastards.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's It Can Happen by Yes.  God bless.

Monday, November 23, 2015

Monday

(Is The Donald telling the truth? I truly don't know.)

Yesterday, I went to church.  The sermon once again centered around Paul.  My pastor loves the apostle more than Jesus himself. No kidding.  According to Paul, we all need a shield to extinguish Satan's fiery arrows.  But the shield doesn't belong to us. Rather, it comes from God.  We can't stand against the devil alone.  Divine intervention is our only hope.  I believe this with all my heart.  The world is pure evil.

I took my family to a sushi restaurant.  We ate tortured shrimp and tortured octopus.  The shrimp were peeled alive.  The unfortunate beasties squirmed back and forth on the plate helplessly.  Then the waitress cut their tiny heads off with a pair of sharp scissors.  Their bodies were consumed raw while their heads were fried with salt.  Meanwhile, the octopus was hacked into pieces.  It's poor little tentacles wiggled around like worms.  I smothered them in hot sauce and devoured the meat greedily.  Now that's good eating.

I watched an episode of Criminal Minds.  It's the sickest show on television.  A hairy fat woman imagines that she's having an affair with her handsome brother-in-law.  She turns into a murderous beast whenever she sees anyone flirting with him.  She kills her victims by strangling them with strips of cloth.  Finally, the FBI catches her because she keeps leaving saliva at the crime scenes.  The poor wildebeest avidly bites her nails.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  The liberal press is nailing Donald Trump for comments he made about black on black crime.  These bleeding hearts make me laugh.  Blacks kill each other at an alarming rate.  On top of that, nearly seventy-five percent of African-American children are growing up without fathers.  Those are just the cold hard facts.  But anyone who speaks these sad truths is labeled as a racist.  I don't get it.

I read the paper later in the day.  The Korean police are clamping down on prostitution.  At least that's what they're telling the public.  The cops closed down twenty-two brothels in Seoul since 2010, confiscating over 2 million dollars.  Prostitution is big business in Asia.  These men love to get their rocks off.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's The Train Kept A Rolling by Aerosmith.  God bless.

Friday, November 20, 2015

Friday

(Fernando and Sophia Richter should be burned alive at the stake.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady made chicken for dinner.  The meal wasn't very good.  Her cooking lacks soul.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles like a pious little dullard.  I'm wonderful that way.  The glass is always half-full at my humble abode.  I washed the food down with a generous portion of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched a recent episode of American Horror Story.  I enjoy the series very much.  Jessica Lange is no longer a part of the show.  She's been replaced this year by Lady Gaga.  Believe it or not, the diva's acting skills aren't that bad.  She's plays the role of a heartless oversexed vampire quite convincingly.  American Horror Story is filled with blood and gore.  It never fails to entertain.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty nihilist.  I asked Jesus to save my sanity.  Sometimes, I feel as if I'm losing my marbles.  It's just hard for me to take anything seriously.  I laugh and laugh and laugh.  The Children of the Rice regard me as an elderly loon.  Perhaps their assessment is correct.  I want to be more like Gregory Peck and less like Alfred E. Newman.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  There's a bizarre case in Arizona involving a couple of psychopaths named Fernando and Sophia Richter.  They held their children hostage in their bedrooms for over three months. The poor girls weren't even allowed to go to the bathroom without permission.  They often had to shit and piss in their closets.  If I were king of the world, I would burn both Fernando and Sophia alive at the stake.  Who needs them?  But unfortunately nobody listens to me.

I read the paper later in the day.  There was an op-ed piece about Korean xenophobia.  Koreans tend to be very suspicious of foreigners.  The author is concerned that the citizens of the ROK might start to dislike Islam.  Actually, the peninsula has a tiny amount of Muslims scattered about here and there.  And we already despise them.  Furthermore, who can blame us?  Islam spreads violence wherever it goes.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Fight the Good Fight by Triumph.  God bless. 

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Thursday

(Muslims will be the death of us all.)

Yesterday, I took my family to McDonald's.  I had the Big Mac set. It came with a Coke and fries.  I'm a huge fan of junk food.  All that salt and sugar and starch send me straight to the moon.  My doctor says that I'm a fat ass.  But I've already given up booze and smokes.  I've got nothing else left.

It's nice to be back with the Dragon Lady.  Don't get me wrong. The woman is definitely a loon.  Nevertheless, we've been married for nearly seventeen years.  And I feel rather lost when she isn't by my side.  Maybe somebody needs to shoot me in the head.  I'm definitely struggling with some issues of my own.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

I watched a recent episode of The Bastard Executioner.  My feelings about the program are luke-warm at best.  The plot is somewhat muddled.  And Katie Segal just doesn't cut it as a medieval witch.  But the violence is first-rate.  A man gets drawn and quartered by the powers-that-be.  You actually get to see his arms and legs torn off with chains attached to horses.  Network television has certainly evolved.  We've come a long way from The Brady Bunch.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy heathen.  I ask Jesus for the same thing every night.  I need to survive for another nineteen-years to make sure my boys get a good start in life.  After that, the Savior is free to zap me with ass cancer.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on CNN.  I'm actually starting to enjoy the network.  The big headlines?  Muslims are acting crazy again, and water is still wet.  Wolf Blitzer talked about the Paris terror attack.  Then he reported a story about a Jewish teacher in southern France being knifed by Muslim teenagers.  After that, Wolf told us that ISIS blew up the Russian airplane with a bomb that was placed inside a can of soda. Mark my words.  Islam will prove the death of us all.

I read the paper later in the day.  Koreans have trouble with depression.  In fact, they lead the world when it comes to suicide.  However, they refuse to take anti-depressants.  Mental illness has a huge stigma here on the ROK. It's sad when you think about it.  Lots of people are dying for nothing.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Changes by Yes.  God bless.

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Tuesday

(Charlie Sheen has HIV.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady made beef and French fries for dinner.  The meal wasn't one of her best efforts.  I find that her food lacks soul.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles with a smile on my face and a song in my heart.  I'm wonderful that way.  I drank several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched a recent episode of The Last Kingdom.  I enjoy the program quite a bit--even though it's produced by the BBC.  Usually, I lack the intellectual capacity to understand British television.  But not in this case.  The violence is marvelous.  The Vikings slaughter many Saxon hostages with their battle axes.  Limbs go flying hither and yon.  That's what I call entertainment. The portrayal of King Alfred is first rate.  He's so worthy of honor and respect.  He comes across as truly regal.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I asked Jesus to watch over me now that I'm back in the Dragon Lady's house.  She's still on her thyroid medicine.  I hope the pills help alleviate her constant anger.  It will probably take divine intervention to make my shitty marriage work.  But stranger things have happened.  I have faith.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  Charlie Sheen has contracted HIV.  I know he lived a wild lifestyle.  And it's certainly prudent not to poke every porno star in the world while doing drugs.  Nevertheless, I feel quite sad about this news.  I used to love Two and a Half Men.  Sheen's comic instincts are right off the charts.  But HIV is no longer a death sentence. The disease can be managed.

I read the paper later in the day.  There was an interesting editorial explaining the Korean fervor for academics.  I envy their energy and drive.  I'm such a lazy bastard.  In fact, I always wanted to live in Europe just so I could get a free apartment and government health care.  My main hobby is relaxing and eating donuts.  I wish I'd been blessed with Asian energy.  Unfortunately, I'm an overweight aging sloth.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's God of Thunder by Kiss.  God bless.   

Monday, November 16, 2015

Monday

(Aaron Rodgers is full of shit.)

Yesterday, I went to church.  The message revolved around Paul.  The church I attend is very Paul-centric.  The pastor discussed spiritual armour.  We must put on our belts of righteousness to protect ourselves from the drunks, porno-hounds, and homosexuals. My preacher's a fundamentalist.  He believes that the earth is only ten thousand-years-old.  But I don't mind.  Plus he keeps me entertained.  I never sleep during his sermons.

I prepared fried chicken for dinner.  The meal was spectacular.  The bird cooked up all crispy and salty and delicious.  I'm truly the king of poultry.  I washed the meal down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched the UFC.  I'm enthralled by all the violence.  The fight of the night took place between Ronda Rousey and Holly Holm.  The first round was for the ages.  Ronda attacked like the beast she is.  But Holly played the role of the skillful matador.  She struck Rousey over and over again with vicious left hands.  Then, in the second round, Holm savagely kicked Ronda right in the head.  The poor woman fell to the ground like a sack of potatoes.  The ref wisely stopped the contest.  Talk about entertainment.

(Ronda Rousey got her ass kicked.)

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy atheist.  I asked Jesus for patience and fortitude.  The Dragon Lady and I are getting back together.  I've decided to drink the spoiled milk for the sake of the children.  They need a mommy and a daddy--even if we're both a little crazy.  Pray for us.

I went to bed at 11 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A fan at Lambeau Field screamed out during a moment of silence.  He said that Muslims suck.  Aaron Rodgers scolded him, saying that his bad attitude is the reason that militant Islam is running amock globally.  What a crock of shit.  Here's a news flash, Mr. Rodgers.  Muslims do suck.  In fact, they're murderous behavior is a disgrace to the entire planet.  Why run from the truth?

I read the paper later in the day.  Fifty-one protesters were arrested in Seoul.  This has something to do with textbooks.  The Korean government is now in the business of writing school material.  Many concerned citizens believe that this type of stuff should be left to the private sector for the sake of historical accuracy.  I stay out of domestic political affairs.  The last thing I need is to end up in prison.  I'm not even sure if the ROK is a democracy. It's best for a foreigner to keep his mouth shut.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Fireworks by Blue Oyster Cult.  God bless.  

Friday, November 13, 2015

Friday

(Trump is going after Carson.)

Yesterday, I took my eldest boy to McDonald's.  We both enjoyed the Big Mac set.  Our meal came with fries and Cokes.  I'm a huge fan of junk food.  The sugar and starch send me straight to the moon.  But I should be careful.  According to my physician, I'm morbidly obese.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

We visited my youngest son Bluce in the hospital.  He's currently getting over a bout of the stomach flu.  Unfortunately, the poor kid's experiencing some nasty complications.  There's water in his knee.  The Dragon Lady told me that  his doctor removed the liquid today with a large syringe.  My child's been having health issues for the past two months.  I'm a tad worried.

I watched several episodes of The Big Bang Theory.  Sheldon and Amy are no longer in a relationship.  So Barry Kripke decides to try his luck.  He sends her a naked picture of himself over his smart phone.  The Big Bang Theory never fails to crack me up.  Jim Parsons has wonderful comic instincts.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty misanthrope.  The main thesis of the Bible seems to be this:  People really suck, so they must rely on the grace of their maker to save them from themselves.  I couldn't agree more.  I'm a terrible son-of-a-bitch. That's why I reach out to Jesus.  Certainly makes sense.  Who else is there?

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  Donald Trump is hurling terrible insults at Dr. Ben Carson. He believes that Carson is a bullshit artist.  On top of that, he said that the voters of Iowa are stupid for believing such crap.  He even compared the doctor to a child molester.  No kidding.  I would tell The Donald to be careful.  But everything he touches turns to gold.  The man truly has the Midas touch.

I read the paper later in the day.  Thirty South Koreans living in China were nabbed by the police for running an internet scam.  They are accused of stealing nearly half a million dollars.  Spending time in a Chinese prison is a scary notion.  Better them than me.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Maybe I'm Amazed by Paul McCartney.  God bless.   

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Thursday

(April Hoagland and Becky Pierce are a couple of lezbos who want to raise a child.)

Yesterday, I took my eldest son to Burger King once again.  We both had the Whopper set.  It came with a Coke and fries.  The meal was delicious.  I'm a huge fan of fast food.  All that sugar makes me feel wonderful.  I've given up booze and cigarettes.  Without junk to gnaw upon, my life would be an endless black hole.

We visited Bluce in the hospital.  He's doing great.  He's running around the room and talking lots of shit.  He would never have been admitted to the hospital in America.  The doctors would have just given him some pills and sent him back home.  However, Korea's different.  Medical costs won't break your back, so it's OK to spend a few nights till the illness clears up.  Bluce will go home tomorrow morning.

I watched the second episode of Ash Vs. the Evil Dead.  This series has my highest recommendation.  The gore is fantastic.  Ash uses a broken bottle to decapitate a demon.  The blood spray is amazing. Plus the show has a great comic tone.  You'll piss yourself laughing.  This is definitely must-see television.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy pagan.  I asked Jesus to restore the health of my son.  I also asked him to let me live for another nineteen years.  I want to give my sons a good start in life.  After that, the Savior is free to zap me with ass cancer.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A judge in Utah removed a foster child from a gay couple.  Luckily, the kid was placed with God-fearing heterosexuals.  The names of the lesbians are April Hoagland and Becky Pierce.  They should be commended for giving their effort and money to such a worthy cause.  But now--for the sake of decency--it's time to step away.  The last thing a rug-rat needs is two mommies or daddies.

I read the paper later in the day.  A man in Seoul strangled his lover.  He killed her because she forgot to wash his shoes and socks.  Here's the rub.  The guy recently got out of prison after doing a five-year stretch for murdering his last girlfriend.  The ROK might want to start handing down some stronger jail sentences.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Girl's Generation shaking their stuff quite nicely.  God bless.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Wednesday

(Katerra Lewis has been charged with manslaughter.)

Yesterday, I took my eldest boy to Burger King.  We both ordered the Whopper set.  The hamburger came with fries and Cokes.  The meal was delicious.  I'm a huge fan of fast food.  All that starch and sugar send me straight to the moon.  I should probably eat healthier.  But I've already given up drinking and smoking.  Without culinary pleasure, there's nothing left in my life.

I visited my youngest son Bluce in the hospital.  He's been suffering with the stomach flu.  The doctors have him hooked up on an intravenous antibiotic drip.  Health care in Korea is much cheaper than the west.  And it's pretty damn good to boot.  The ROK has world class facilities.  In fact, the powers-that-be are now trying to attract medical tourists to the country.

I watched the UFC.  I absolutely adore mixed martial arts.  I used to be a varsity wrestler back in high school.  No kidding. But my skills weren't all that impressive.  Nevertheless, watching violence on the television really gets my juices flowing.  My favorite fight of the night featured Glover Teixeira.  He beat the living shit out of Patrick Cummings over the course of two rounds.  Blood was everywhere, making the mat all slick and slippery.  Now that's entertainment.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy pagan.  I asked Jesus to forgive me for enjoying the UFC so much.  If I had lived in Rome back in the day, I probably would have had a favorite gladiator.  But what can I tell you?  I love violent sports.  Poor old Smith is guilty as charged.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A 26-year-old woman from Alabama named Katerra Lewis left her six illegitimate children at home by themselves.  Why?  She wanted to get drunk at a club.  Her 8-year-old son proceeded to murder her  1-year-old daughter.  He beat her to death because she was crying too loudly.  Ms. Lewis has been charged with manslaughter.  Like all witches, she should be burned alive at the stake.  So let it be written; so let it be done.

I read the paper later in the day.  Korean students are very ambitious.  They often cheat on their SATs in order to get into first-rate American universities.  The government has vowed to crackdown on the naughty school children.  Good luck with that.  Even their crazy mothers support this type of dishonest nonsense.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's I Am the Walrus by Frank Zappa.  God bless.

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Tuesday

(Starbucks hates Jesus Christ.)

Yesterday, I prepared chicken for dinner.  I eat a lot of poultry.  It's both cheap and delicious.  Plus I have mucho talent when it comes to cooking bird.  The secret is to use lots of grease and salt.  No kidding.  Then just fry the meat until the flesh turns a crispy brown.  I washed the meal down with several glasses of generic cola.  I no longer drink alcohol.  I enjoy being clear-headed.

Against my better judgment, I visited the Dragon Lady once again.  My youngest boy Bluce is still in the hospital.  But not to worry.  He's doing fine.  However, my oldest child is now living with me for the time being.  I went to pick up his clothes and tablet.  My wife verbally assaulted me with her atrocious language and threatened to punch me in the head with a closed fist.  I sometimes think that I married a demon.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty nihilist.  I asked Jesus to help Bluce through his current illness.  My son has been sick a lot recently.  I want to enroll him in martial arts to toughen him up.  However, he shows little interest in Tae Kwon Doe. So what's a daddy to do?

I went to bed at 11:30 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on CNN.  I'm beginning to enjoy the network more and more.  Starbucks is changing the design of its Christmas cup.  From now on, the Styrofoam mug will simply be plain red.  All scenes of holiday merrymaking have been eradicated.  I'm not the least bit shocked.  Most corporations hate Christ.  Mark my words.  As America becomes more and more secular, her greatness shall fade.

I read the paper later in the day.  Older security guards at an apartment building in Pusan are being forced to bow to the younger residents.  Many Koreans are furious over this state of affairs.  The ROK is very Confucian.  The young are expected to show respect to those who are older than them.  Forcing geezers to bow to children just doesn't fly on the peninsula.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's You Keep Me hanging On by Vanilla Fudge.  God bless.

Monday, November 9, 2015

Monday

(Being homeless in Hawaii is definitely in my future.)

Yesterday, my youngest son Bluce caught a stomach infection.  He had to see a doctor.  I met the Dragon Lady at her apartment.  We were supposed to drive to the hospital together.  She got angry and broke my glasses.  Then she clawed my face with her fingernails.  So I guess her medicine isn't working too well.

Korea is very convenient.  I found a place and got new glasses in less than an hour.  The cost?  Sixty dollars.  Not too shabby. I've decided to remain separated from my wife.  I can't handle violence.  It pisses me off too much.  I'm afraid I might do something stupid.

I cooked chicken for dinner.  The meal was fantastic.  Poultry is my specialty.  My secret is salt.  A liberal amount makes the bird taste better.  I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.  In all seriousness, I get my cola at Emart.  It's less than a dollar a bottle, and it rocks.  Emart has some great stuff.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I asked Jesus for more patience.  When my wife rages, she says some pretty inane things.  She's trying to get my older son to quit school. No shit.  The kid's only fourteen.  She acts this way to hurt me.  And here's the truth.  I've done nothing too her.  No girlfriends. No abuse. No addiction. No gambling debts. Etc.  This hatred is all in her head.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  Hawaii has a severe homelessness problem.  Most of those living on the streets are actually employed.  It's just that the housing prices are so outrageous that they have no place to go. Hawaii's problem is about to get worse.  I'm thinking of moving to the island and becoming a hobo.  I don't need a house.  I just need enough coin for booze and smokes.

I read the paper later in the day.  The Japanese still detest South Koreans after all these years.  In fact, over sixty-percent regard Koreans in a negative light.  This goes back to when the peninsula was a Japanese colony.  Both nations genuinely hate the other.  Prime minister Abe loves the animosity.  He continually lights incense to dead war criminals just to rankle his Asian neighbors.  He's weird about that kind of stuff.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Uncle John's Band by The Grateful Dead.  God bless. 

Friday, November 6, 2015

Friday

(Tyshawn Lee was gunned down by a Chicago street gang.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady stopped by my apartment and made chicken.  The meal was nothing special.  I find that her poultry lacks soul.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles like a young faithful dullard.  I'm wonderful that way.  I washed it down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.

I watched Mad Men.  I'm currently on season four.  The boys have lost the Lucky Strike account, and they're desperately searching for work. Don writes a full-page opinion piece to the New York Times slamming the tobacco industry.  Of course, his co-workers aren't pleased with his rash decision.  In fact, Bert Cooper is so outraged that he leaves the firm in a huff.  Mad Men rocks.  Give it a try.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy pagan.  I asked Jesus to give me abundant patience.  I recently got into an argument with a friend.  She's a feminist who hates the novel Fifty Shades of Grey. I told her that if the main characters happened to be a couple of lesbians, she'd be perfectly OK with the dominant-submissive relationship.  I fear that I hurt her feelings.  But I'm tired of liberals telling me what I'm allowed to read and watch.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A little nine-year-old black boy from Chicago was gunned down by a local street gang.  His killing was meant to hurt his father--who is a member of a rival organization.  The African-American community really has to start getting its act together.  Illegitimacy, crime, drugs, etc.  Enough is enough.  Time to stop blaming Whitey and take charge of the situation.

I read the paper later in the day.  Another adulteress was stoned to death in Afghanistan.  Her parents had already arranged her marriage, but she decided to elope with her boyfriend instead.  The powers-that-be were none too happy.  Islam is an absolute scourge affecting the entire globe.  Mark my words. Muslims will be the death of us all.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Thank You by Led Zeppelin.  God bless.

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Thursday

(It's time for the homos to get back into the closet.)

Yesterday, I took the boys to McDonald's.  We enjoyed Big Macs and French fries and Chicken McNuggets.  I washed the vittles down with genuine Coca-Cola.  I'm a big fan of fast food.  Starch and sugar send me straight to the moon.  I'm just thankful that I can afford meat.  At least I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I watched another episode of The Last Kingdom.  King Alfred is standing up to the viking horde. He tells them in no uncertain terms to flee or face the dire consequences of their Christian masters.  Of course, the pagans are unfazed.  They see the ruler as a weak farmer.  But they're about to get their asses royally kicked. Good for the English.  Somebody had to show those pagans their proper place.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty atheist.  I asked Jesus to protect his Christian children from the blood-stained hands the Islamic devils. What happened recently to the Russian airline is more Muslim lunacy.  The religion of peace strikes again. 

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I was back in high school taking a test.  I didn't know the answers, so I asked my teacher for help.  She yelled at me.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  The gays in Texas are bitterly disappointed that the citizens of Houston want sodomites and lady-boys to stay out of the female public restrooms. Sometimes, the homosexual community just goes too far.  I liked them much better when they were all in the closet.

I read the paper later in the day.  The CEO of a Korean online service provider was found guilty of not doing enough to prevent child pornography from appearing on the internet.  He might even get jail time.  Lots of executives go to prison in the ROK.  Maybe that's a good thing.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's a Korean singer named Dayhe shaking her stuff quite nicely.  God bless.

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

Wednesday

(Jack Yantis is dead.)

Yesterday, I prepared fried chicken for dinner.  Poultry is my specialty. I also cooked six strips of thick Emart bacon.  The meal was delicious.  Bacon makes everything a little bit better.  I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a broke dead dick, so I can't afford the good stuff.  Nevertheless, I try to remain positive.  At least I wasn't born in Chad.

I watched a show called The Last Kingdom.  If you enjoy the conflicts between the Danes and the English, then you'll love this program.  Anything concerning vikings excites me.  The violence is off the charts.  King Edmund mouths off to the dirty unkempt pagans.  So they fill him full of arrows.  The smug limey drops to the ground like a sack of potatoes.  Great stuff.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy nihilist.  I asked Jesus to protect me from the Dragon Lady.  I really enjoy living by myself.  The peace is bliss.  I'd like to keep our present arrangement.  Lots of married people live apart.  Plus I'm up to my asshole in stress.  The last thing I need is a screaming demon getting me all hot and bothered.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A rancher from Idaho named Jack Yantis was shot and killed by police.  Its seems that Mr. Yantis's bull got loose and was hit by a car.  The beast kept charging the emergency vehicles, so the powers-that-be decided to put it down.  Jack showed up on the scene waving his rifle and talking shit.  Tragedy ensued.  Sometimes, it's important to submit to authority. If you have a legitimate beef, then you can always file a lawsuit.

I read the paper later in the day.  Koreans have some of the longest working hours in the entire world.  The only country that outranks them is Mexico.  I don't envy the denizens of the ROK.  These are some frazzled souls.  They're born, they study, they get a job, and they die.  Pleasure is a foreign concept.  That's why they're always jumping out their windows.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's a Korean girl band named Rainbow shaking their stuff quite nicely.  God bless.

Monday, November 2, 2015

Monday

(Reginald Gildersleeve is dead.)

Yesterday, I prepared steak for dinner.  The meal wasn't very tasty.  I'm just not good with beef.  I need more practice.  I also ate an apple.  I'm trying to get more fruit into my diet.  I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola.  I've decided to avoid alcohol.  It dries me out.

The Dragon Lady called.  She wants us to get back together.  The woman's truly a loon.  I shit you not.  Nevertheless, I don't believe in divorce.  Plus she's now on medication.  So, against my better judgment, I'm going to give our marriage another chance.  She recently bought a car.  It's a small Japanese model with the steering wheel on the right-hand side.  It cost eighteen grand.  We pick it up next week.

I watched a marvelous show called Ash Vs. the Evil Dead.  It's about an aging Lothario who fights demons.  He only has one hand.  The program's chock full of blood and guts.  It's also laugh-out-loud funny.  I give it my highest recommendation.  Sam Raimi is the creator.  He was also involved with Spartacus: Blood and Sand.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy misanthrope.  I begged Jesus to protect me from the Dragon Lady.  I'm not sure if I can handle her rage.  I'm already up to my asshole in stress.

I went to bed at midnight.  I had a strange dream.  Stray cats kept walking into my house.  I had to get up and put them back outside.  I became frustrated.  I shouted the word fuck over and over again.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  A man named Reginald Gildersleeve attempted to rob a gun store in Chicago with a fake firearm.  One of the customers was packing a pistol.  He shot Mr. Gildersleeve to death with a fatal wound to the chest.  What is it with African Americans?  They just never follow the law.

I read the paper later in the day.  The Doosan Bears are celebrating their victory over the Samsung Lions.  The Bears are now the new champions of the Korean Baseball Organization.  This is the team's first championship in fourteen years.  Good for them.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's a Korean girl band named Stellar shaking their stuff quite nicely.  God bless.