Friday, October 9, 2015

Friday

(Ben Carson angers the left yet again.)

Yesterday, I prepared chicken for dinner.  I did an excellent job.  The meat came out all crisp and salty and delicious.  Poultry is my specialty.  I washed the vittles down with two bottles of Jinro soju.  It's cheap rot-gut moonshine, but it gets the job done.  You can get shitfaced in Korea for less than two dollars.  Who could ask for more?

I didn't watch television.  I listened to music instead.  I shook my flabby ass and jiggling man-tits to the tunes of David Bowie.  Major Tom is one of my favorite songs.  For a second, I actually thought I was cool.  However, I suddenly remembered my rotting teeth and swollen ankles.  I wanted to cry, but I held my emotions in check.  I'm quite macho.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy atheist.  I asked Jesus to let me live for another nineteen years.  I want to give my boys a good start in life.  After that, the Savior is free to zap me with painful ass cancer.  No big deal.  We all have to die sometime.

I went to bed at 11 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  I was back in the hospital with my youngest son Bluce.  He attacked me with a hypodermic needle.  Then the nurses started screaming about an imminent explosion.  I ran into the parking lot and the ground floor blew up, sending glass everywhere.  The experience was extremely vivid.

I woke up at 10 a.m. and turned on CNN.  I no longer have Fox News.  What a pisser.  Ben Carson suggested that the Jews might have fared better during WWII if they had armed themselves with weapons.  The left is outraged, but I agree with the doctor.  It's only common sense.  It's hard for a government to oppress well-armed citizens.  Perhaps I'm a neanderthal.

I read the paper later in the day.  A high school student from Taegu got upset because her mother didn't pick her up from class on time.  So she went home and committed suicide by jumping out of her apartment window.  Koreans kill themselves quite often.  I have no idea why.  Maybe the urge for self-destruction comes from being godless.  This peninsula's teeming with ungrateful pagans.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Behind Blue Eyes by The Who.

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