Wednesday, June 5, 2013

On Hiatus


My inspiration to write has shit the bed.  Perhaps my muse is a drug addict.  Sadly, this hobby is beginning to feel like a chore.  So I'm taking an indefinite break.  I'll probably return next autumn.
 
I'm not bailing on the blog.  Far from it.  Communicating is the only thing I do well.  I just need a rest to recharge the batteries.  

Anyway, see you when I see you.  And God bless.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Wednesday

(Oz is first-rate television.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady made pork and French fries for dinner.  The meal was good.  The Smith family eats a lot of pig.  Sadly, we can't afford beef.  However, things could be worse.  At least we aren't stuck in Djibouti.  Talk about Shit Creek.

My eldest son packed his clothes.  He's going away for three days on a school trip.  Jim's a noisy kid.  The silence will be a true pleasure.  I can watch television without having to hear him argue with his crazy mother.  She needs to go on a field trip, too.

I watched Oz.  I like the program a lot.  An inmate named Beecher is in a serious beef with a Nazi named Schillinger.  These men play for keeps.  There's no mercy.  Even their children are used as pawns.  The relationship between the two is spellbinding. Oz is downright gripping.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy atheist.  I have a code.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  

The SAT has been cancelled in Korea for the month of May.  Too many students got caught cheating.  I hate to sound racist.  But I must tell the truth.  Asians cheat quite frequently.  You need eyes in the back of your head to keep tabs on these people.

I turned on Fox News.  A Chinese woman flushed her newborn down the toilet.  The baby managed to survive.  Citizens have been sending flowers, food, and diapers to the hospital.  Good for them.  Perhaps the Kung Fu Nation is finally starting to respect life.  One can only hope.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Saturday, May 25, 2013

Saturday

(Jim loves Starcraft.  The boy's a crackhead.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady went to E-Mart.  She bought a large pizza for ten dollars.  It tasted like cardboard.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

Jim played video games.  His favorite is Starcraft.  Surprisingly, his mother didn't bust his ass.  She's being quite lenient these days.  I don't blame her.  Peace is a beautiful thing.

I watched the two hour season finale of Criminal Minds.  Agent Strauss is murdered by an angry fed who calls himself The Replicator.  The villain uses poison to commit his foul deeds.  He eventually gets blown to bits with his own bomb.  Serves him right.

I paid homage to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Isiah predicted the coming of Jesus seven hundred years before the actual birth.  The prophet was cut in half with a wooden saw.  It made no difference.  God's will is God's will.  Earthly kings only possess the illusion of power.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 8 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A pop-singer recently attempted suicide.  He's grieving the passing of his dead girlfriend.

I turned on Fox News.  The Indiana Pacers defeated the Miami Heat in game two of the playoffs.  Good for them.  I miss sports.

Anyway, it's currently five p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Friday

(Ryu Hyun-jin is the real deal.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served spicy pork and French fries for dinner.  The meat was way too hot.  I felt like my teeth were melting.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

Jim played Starcraft.  Usually, his mother doesn't put up with video game nonsense.  However, she was busy rearranging the shelves.  We  live in a Soviet-style concrete tenement.  Space is a hard to come by.  We're always tripping over each other.

I watched OZ.  Beecher goes insane.  He uses a dumbbell to assault an Aryan.  Then he shits on the unconscious man's face.  Oz is brutal.  I enjoy the series with a passion.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy nihilist who worships chaos and decay.  The strong don't survive.  And the elite shall perish.  My final analysis?  Make sure you're fighting for the right army.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Ryu Hyun-jin won another game.  He now has five victories and two losses.  Ryu is the real deal.  He's an ace and a strong contender for the Cy Young Award.

I turned on Fox News.  The Boy Scouts are finally accepting homosexuals.  I wish the gay community would crawl back into the closet.  But they're here, they're queer, and I had better just get used to it.  Times change, and I'm not a hater.  Besides, I've got too much on my plate to worry about the queens.

Anyway, it's nearly 5 p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Thursday

(Islam will eventually kill us all.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady had an appointment.  So I was forced to cook my own dinner.  I prepared pork and French fries.  I did a fine job.  The meal was delicious.

Jim played Starcraft in his bedroom.  My son is a video crackhead.  Sadly, I no longer care.  At least he isn't mainlining heroin.  That's the way I look at the situation.  The glass is definitely half-full.

I watched Game of Thrones.  The fat guy and his homely girlfriend become surrounded by hundreds of crows.  The birds caw and caw and caw.  Then a monster with florescent blue eyes appears on the scene.  The fat man kills the beast.  The end.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  I refuse to babble like a pagan.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A dead woman was discovered in a pop-singer's car.  The police suspect suicide.  They found a note.

I turned on Fox News.  A British soldier in London was beheaded in broad daylight.  Militant ragheads are to blame.  Mark my words.  Those Islamic bastards will end up killing us all.  Just wait till they get their filthy hands on weaponized small pox.

Anyway, it's nearly 4 p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Wednesday

(Willie Nelson is eighty.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served shrimp fajitas for dinner.  My wife is the shrimp fajita queen.  The meal was delicious.  I'm a big fan of seafood--especially shellfish.  I'd never make it as a Jew.

Bluce studied English.  He's only five-years-old.  Nevertheless, that kid loves cracking the books.  Unfortunately, he's not the brightest crayon in the box.  Bluce is about as smart as a dolphin.  Sadly, he'll never attend Princeton.  But who gives a flying screw?

I continued watching Oz.  The program is absolutely brutal.  It's filled with unsettling images of rape and murder.  However, the bible is much more graphic and disturbing.  Read Judges 19-21.  You tell me.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  If it weren't for Jesus, I'd just be another misguided pagan or filthy atheist.  I owe him a debt of gratitude.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A six-month-old was found dead in a nursery.  The cops suspect foul play.  The child's corpse is being analysed for shaken-baby syndrome.

I turned on Fox News.  Willie Nelson held a benefit concert in Texas.  The proceeds went to the victims of the explosion in Waco.  Willie is eighty-years-old.  He still looks good.  Listen to this tune.  It rocks.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Tuesday

(Sir Alex Ferguson calls it quits.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady had an appointment.  So I prepared my own food.  I made spicy pork and French fries.  I washed the meal down with several glasses of Coke.  I'm becoming quite an accomplished cook.

Jim played Starcraft.  Then he completed some Korean homework with his mother.  They've been getting along much better.  I enjoy a peaceful apartment.  Strife sucks.

I watched a program called Oz.  It's a brutal prison drama.  The series is certainly riveting.  I wouldn't survive a day in the penal system.  I'm much too handsome and sweet-natured.  They'd pass me around for cigarettes and drug money.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  I've got a lot of problems.  My demons have demons.  But Jesus helps calm my feverish brain.  He's a celestial chill pill.

I went to bed.  I had a strange dream.  A woman carried my head in a glass jar.  She wandered around a sandy desert while my headless body followed her.  I really need to start drinking again.

I woke up at 6 a.m.  I read the paper.  Sir Alex Ferguson is no longer the manager for Manchester United.  His final game was a classic.  It ended in a 5-all draw.

I turned on Fox News.  A deadly tornado hit Oklahoma.  Many children were killed.  Life is short and brutal.  Spread your love because tomorrow a piano might fall on your head.

Anyway, I'll talk to you later.  God bless.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Sunday

(David Beckham is retiring.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served beef and French fries for dinner.  The meal was good.  I also drank several large glasses of Coke.  Then I snacked on pretzels.  I enjoy eating.  It's all I got left.

The boys went to a festival with their mother.  They listened to music and played soccer.  Jim's not an athlete.  But that's OK.  Most Asians suck at sports.  Here on the peninsula, wearing glasses and excelling at math only enhance one's chances of finding a smoking-hot girlfriend.  Go figure.

I downloaded a new series called Revolution.  It's about a post-apocalyptic world without electricity.  The show is a tad simple-minded.  Nevertheless, I'm hooked.  I'm no rocket scientist, my friends.  Sometimes I enjoy giving my brain a much needed rest.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Jesus's real name is Joshua.  It means one who saves.  You probably already knew that.  Interesting stuff.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 8 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper. 

David Beckham retired.  I'll never forget when he got sent off the field against Argentina back in the 1998 World Cup.  He was just a kid.  I was afraid hooligans might murder him.  Europeans act like real assholes when it comes to soccer.  Their behavior is often shameful.

I turned on Fox News. Rand Paul was on Huckabee.  Rand thinks that Hillary Clinton isn't qualified to be the next president.  He's probably right.  The problem, however, is the republicans have no one capable of defeating her.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Saturday

(Harold and Kumar:  Funny stuff)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served spicy pork and egg rolls for dinner.  The meal was way too hot.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

Jim refused to study.  So we enjoyed a movie night instead.  The first film on the agenda was Harold and Kumar Escape From Gitmo.  What can I tell you?  I laughed, I cried.  This was followed by the original Carrie featuring Sissy Spacek and John Travolta.  Bluce was so frightened that he nearly pissed his pants.

Yes.  A great time was had by all.  The Children of the Rice might not be Harvard material.  Nevertheless, they know how to have fun.

I paid homage to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Kneeling is important.  It symbolizes submission to God's will.

I went to bed at midnight.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 9 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper. 

Korean parents are crazy about education.  Some even manufacture fake passports to get their children into swanky international schools which cater to foreign children.  The government is getting tired of ambitious tiger moms.  Hefty fines will soon be issued.  Maybe.

I turned on Fox News.  The IRS scandal is still dominating the headlines.  Don't be surprised if Obama gets himself impeached.  His hubris is boundless.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Friday, May 17, 2013

Friday

(Hannibal rocks.  What a great show.)

Yesterday, Bluce went on a field trip with his kindergarten.  So I took the rest of my family to Pizza Hut.  We enjoyed spaghetti and personal pan pizzas.  The meal was delicious.

I weigh a ton.  I'm pushing 210 pounds.  None of my clothes fit.  I have to purchase a whole new wardrobe.  Sadly, Smith is just another fat Yankee.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

Jim studied Korean social studies with his mother.  They're getting along splendidly.  I have no idea what happened.  I live in a bizarre world.  Soon the sky shall fall.

I watched Hannibal.  The experience was wonderful.  Dr. Lechtner kills two men.  He snaps one man's neck with expert precision.  Then he bludgeons a haughty murderer to death with a heavy statue.  Good stuff.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Jesus stands hand in hand with the poor and oppressed.  Therefore, we should never succumb to idolatry.  Worshipping at the feet of the golden calf is fatal.  Why sell ourselves so cheaply?

I went to bed at midnight.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 8 a.m.  I had to piss like a racehorse. 

I drank coffee and read the paper.  There's a Korean baseball player named Choo.  He's a member of the Cincinnati Reds.  Yesterday, he hit two home runs against the Marlins.  Choo's having a great season.  Good for him.

I turned on Fox News.  President Obama is a liar.  No big surprise.  Bush was a liar.  And Clinton was a liar.  And Bush the elder was a liar.  And Reagan was a liar.  And Nixon was a liar.  The list goes on and on.  Only an idiot trusts the government.

Put your faith in Jesus Christ.  Everyone else will let you down.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Thursday

(Criminal Minds is a sick disgusting show.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady had an appointment.  So I made dinner.  I cooked French fries and egg rolls.  The meal was good.  However, I can't take all the credit.  My magnificent Phillips air-fryer did most of the heavy lifting.

Jim didn't study.  He's on break from school because tomorrow's Buddha's birthday.  He goes back Monday.  The boy hates cracking the books.  He's a lazy little bastard--just like his daddy.  We were born to lounge.

I watched Criminal Minds.  It's the sickest show on television.  A man hates women.  He guts his victims and makes them clean their own blood as they slowly die.  Disturbing stuff.  Nevertheless, I'm a huge fan.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  It's not like I'm some misguided pagan.

I went to bed at 9 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Nine men were arrested in Seoul for smuggling fake Viagra from China.  They were caught selling the pills to local pharmacies.

I turned on Fox News.  Obama's in a world of shit.  He just fired the head of the IRS.  More heads shall role as he and his cronies attempt to cover their asses.

It's currently two p.m.  I'm knackered.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Wednesday

(Is Obama the new Nixon?)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served chili for dinner.  The meal came from a can.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.  

Jim studied Korean social studies with his mother.  Normally, I'm against excessive school work.  I want him to go outside and make friends.  

However, Asian kids crack the books.  The playground at our apartment complex is often empty.  So what's an American boy to do?  When in Rome... 

I watched Game of Thrones.  I like the show a lot.  The strange-looking Amazonian woman is forced to fight a bear.  One-handed Jamie saves her life.  Good stuff.

I paid homage to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  In fact, this blog's primarily devotional.  Communicating is what I do best.  I have nothing else to offer God.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 5:30 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  

A mother and father from the city of Inchon beat their 8-year-old son to death.  They became enraged when the child lied about watching television past his bedtime.  They're both currently in prison.

I turned on Fox News.  Attorney General Eric Holder stole phone records from the Associated Press.  He's looking for a White House leak.  I'm not surprised.  Obama is Nixon-esque.

It's now 12:30 p.m.  I just ate a bacon sandwich.  Yum.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.       

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Tuesday

(President Joker is drowning in his own hubris.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady had an appointment.  So I cooked my own vittles.  I prepared beef and French fries.  The task wasn't too difficult.  My magnificent Phillips air-fryer did most of the work.

Jim refused to study.  He played Starcraft instead.  My eldest son's a video crackhead.  But what's a daddy to do?  I'm tired of being a hard-ass.  Sadly, poor old Smith's been defeated by a 12-year-old boy.  What a pisser.

I finished season seven of Weeds.  I enjoy the series a lot.  American television is experiencing a true renaissance.  The networks are producing some real gems.

I prayed to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  I refuse to live my life like a filthy nihilist.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A Korean man hit a woman on the head with a hammer.  Then he dumped her body in the ocean.  He's now in jail.

I turned on Fox News.  The IRS has been auditing anti-Obama organizations.  This news doesn't surprise me.  President Joker reminds me of Nixon.  He's drowning in his own hubris.  

Anyway, it's currently 3:30 p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.  

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Sunday

(Life in Djibouti ain't for me.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served beef and French fries for dinner.  The meal was good.  I ate every last morsel.  I'm a lucky man.  I could've been born in Djibouti.  Think about it.

Jim didn't want to study.  His mother yelled at him.  Then she hit him on the arm with the Spoon of Justice.  Her beating left a nasty red welt.  I finally put my foot down.  Enough is enough.

I fired the poor woman.  She's no longer allowed to teach my eldest boy in any subject.  She's simply not up to the task.  I should have done this months ago.

Jim's suspended from using the computer.  His crack-head lifestyle is over.  He now has to go outside and play for at least an hour a day.  I want him making friends his own age.  Jim speaks the language like a native rice-eater.  He has no excuse for being an outsider.

I watched Breaking Bad.  Walt poisons a kid with Lilly of the Valley.  Then he murders a teenager while robbing a train.  Walt's the greatest psychopath in television history.  Bar none.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  I refuse to babble like a pagan.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream.  A Korean man was yelling at my pastor.  He said that attendance was too paltry to keep the church open.  Furthermore, if more people didn't start coming, he'd find a new leader.

I woke up at 8 a.m.  I drank coffee, but I didn't read the paper.  I couldn't be bothered.  I'm tired of looking at my wife and kids.  So I'm hiding in an internet cafe.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Saturday

(Hillary Clinton is a filthy pig.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady went shopping at E-Mart.  She bought a huge pepperoni pizza.  The pie cost ten dollars.  It tasted like cardboard.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

My youngest son Bluce goes to art school.  He's only five-years-old.  However, his mother is a real Asian lunatic.  She wants to give him the best education our paltry money can buy.

Bluce made me a card.  It included his picture.  He never gives us any problems.  Unlike his brother, he actually enjoys studying.  The kid's a freak.

I watched Breaking Bad.  I'm on season four.  I've seen all the episodes a million times.  Yet the series never gets old.  Breaking Bad is a true work of genius.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  I'm a screwed up guy.  My demons have demons.  But Jesus didn't come for the healthy.  He came for the sick.  And that's great news for me.

I went to bed at 9 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  President Park's spokesman got fired.  He groped a 21-year-old girl while in Washington D.C.  He was promptly sent home.

I turned on Fox News.  The Benghazi story is certainly strange.  Nevertheless, I'm not surprised.  Hillary Clinton is a power-hungry filthy pig.  Her bad behavior's simply par for the course.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Thursday

(Jodi Arias found guilty of murder.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served pork and egg rolls for dinner.  The egg rolls were smothered in chili sauce.  The meal was good.  I try not to complain.  I'm just thankful that I wasn't born in Chad.

Jim studied Korean with his mother.  They fought like cats and dogs.  My son hates to study.  He's the only Asian on the planet who struggles with math.  What a pisser.

I watched Game of Thrones.  The series is a great metaphor for life.  We scheme and dream to reach our goals.  We chase power, money, and security.  But all our grand plans are a load of shit.  We kick the bucket and turn to dust.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  I refuse to bow to death and decay.  I worship the living, not the dead.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.

There's a Korean man named Choo.  He plays for the Cincinnati Reds.  Yesterday, he hit a walk-off home run.  Good for him.

I turned on Fox News.  Jodi Arias was found guilty of murder.  She cut her boyfriend's throat.  Then she shot him a few times just for kicks.  The prosecution wants her to die.  I'm against the death penalty.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Wednesday

(Norman's mother is a hottie.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served ribs for dinner.  The meal was delicious.  We eat quite a bit of pork in the Smith house.  Sadly, we're far too poor for beef.  But I'm not complaining.  I'm just thankful that I wasn't born in the Republic of Chad.  Things could always be worse.

Jim studied Korean with his mother.  She yelled at him several times.  I bet Bluce a dollar that she would strike him with the Spoon of Justice.  I lost the wager.  

True.  The Dragon Lady's no Alan Alda.  Yet the poor woman's trying her best to remain patient with the boy.  Believe me.  It's not an easy task.  Jim's a major league ball-breaker.

I watched The Bates Motel.  Norman's getting creepier every day.  He's now studying taxidermy with his weird little girlfriend.  I fully expect him to blow his stack and slaughter his mother during the next episode.  But what do I know?  Let the writers have their fun.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I refuse to babble like a pagan.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 4:30 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A contractor from Seoul got arrested.  He hired women to perform sexual favors for his clients.  Prostitution is rampant here in Asia.  Men often pay money to get their rocks off.

I turned on Fox News.  Three kidnapped women were discovered in Cleveland.  The women had been missing for ten years.  One had even given birth while in captivity.  Three strange brothers are the prime suspects.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Tuesday

(We're murdering too many babies.  It's a holocaust.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served spicy pork and French fries for dinner.  The meal was good.  I ate every last morsel.  Then I washed it all down with a large glass of Coke.  

Jim studied the Korean language with his mother.  He didn't want to work.  So they fought like cats and dogs.  Their constant bickering used to bother me.  Now it just rolls off my back like rain from a duck's ass.  I'm probably too sick to care.

I watched The Big Bang Theory.  I enjoy the show a great deal.  The Indian professor can't talk to women unless he's been drinking.  He's currently having sexual fantasies about Howard's wife.  Funny stuff.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  The bible is a weird tome.  The death and resurrection of Jesus are foretold many times in the Old Testament with creepy accuracy.  The ancient prophets give me chills.

I went to bed at 9 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  The police in Ulsan are searching for a foreign pervert.  He's been getting his jollies by looking up women's dresses while riding the escalators at Hyundai Department Store.  He's even snapped a few photos.

I turned on Fox News.  The abortion case in Philadelphia is quite outrageous.  The babies were callously murdered after being born alive.  But I'm biased.  I'm very much pro-life.  We're in the midst of a holocaust.

Anyway, it's nearly four p.m.  Poor old Smith is knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.     

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Sunday

(Walter White is the greatest psycopath in television history.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served pork and French fries for dinner.  She didn't use any spice.  I like hot food a great deal.  But my taste buds needed the rest.  Lately, her meals have been melting my teeth.

My sister-in-law came for a visit.  She brought her two children.  Smith's apartment is far too small for such festivities.  So the entire family slept in a public bathhouse.  Sleeping in bathhouses is very common here on the peninsula.  I don't know why.  Asia's strange.

I watched Breaking Bad.  I've seen the series a million times.  It's my favorite.  Walt is the greatest psychopath in television history.  He's pure evil.

I paid homage to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer in the closet--as per instructions.  And why not?  I'm no match for God's will.  I know my place in this world.  On my knees.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I kept coughing.  Perhaps I've contracted bird flu.  Soon I'll be dead.  I'll certainly miss chatting with the Children of the Rice.  But no more alarm clocks!  Yippeee.

I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A man from Kentucky repeatedly raped an underage female.  He hid in Korea for several years using an alias.  The FBI and the Korean authorities finally apprehended him.  He's committed no crimes in the ROK.  So he'll be extradited to the United States as soon as the possible.

I turned on Fox News.  The world is going to hell in a hand-basket.  The network blames the liberal agenda for the current sorry state of affairs.  However, everything will be right as rain if we come to our senses and start greasing Syrians in another illegal war.  Same old story, same old song and dance.

I'm busy these days.  I might cut my blog entries to twenty a month.  That should fulfill my Christian requirement of spreading The Word.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Friday, May 3, 2013

Friday

(Little Psy attacked by Korean netziens.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served chicken noodle soup for dinner.  I'm feeling poorly.  My allergies are flaring up.  She hoped the soup would help.  It didn't.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  I refuse to babble like a pagan. 

I went to bed at 5 p.m.  I slept until 6 a.m.  That's 13 hours of shut-eye.  I must have needed the rest.

I drank coffee and read the Korean Times.  A five-year-old Indian girl was abducted and raped by several men.  She died in the hospital.  What's with these Indian guys?  Those maniacs are running wild.

The paper featured another interesting story.  Psy is a big deal here on the peninsula.  There's a little half-Vietnamese boy who enjoys imitating the YouTube star.  Korean cyber-bullies attacked the eight-year-old calling him racially inferior.

People are pigs wallowing in their own filth--myself included.  That's why we need Jesus in our lives.  The King is a spiritual car wash for the soul.  He cleans us up.

I turned on Fox News.  The network believes that liberals are taking over the universe.  Bill O'Reilly is very concerned that we are becoming a socialist nation.  Ho-hum.

I plan to keep posting about 20-25 times a month.  Why?  I believe that every Christian has a duty to evangelize.  Hosting a blog seems like a great way to spread The Word.

Anyway, it's nearly 9:30 p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Wednesday

(Norma and Norman Bates)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served soup for dinner.  The meal was good.  It came with beef and translucent noodles.  I usually don't enjoy ethnic food.  But I try my best to approach things with an open mind.

In the past, I've even snacked on innocent puppies.  Koreans still consider man's best friend quite the delicacy.  In fact, my mother-in-law is very fond of eating Fido.  I don't really care for the taste.  Canine is boiled in a broth.  So the whole restaurant usually reeks of wet dog.  Yuck.

Jim didn't study.  My wife's becoming Dr. Phil.  She's doing her best to relate to our eldest child.  Therefore, the Spoon of Justice has been shelved.

I watched another episode of Bates Motel.  There's a Chinese girl living in a cop's basement.  She's a kidnapped sex slave.  Norman wants to save her.  Sadly, he doesn't seem to have the balls.  The show is top notch.  Give it a try.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  That's what Jesus tells us to do.  I refuse to babble like a pagan.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't get much sleep.  My allergies are killing me.  Smith's head is a painful ball of snot.  Perhaps I'll get lucky and die.

I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Current unemployment in Spain is hovering at 27 percent.  I don't know how a country can hold a democracy together with that type of profound joblessness.  I've got a funny feeling that the Arab Spring shall start creeping into Europe.

I turned on Fox News.  There was more about the Boston bombers.  The mother claims that her boys had a strange relationship with the FBI.  I believe her.  There's information about these young men being withheld from the public.  Are they patsies?

Anyway, it's almost three p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Tuesday

(Ragnar is a naughty viking.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served spicy pork and French fries for dinner.  The food was too hot.  Don't get me wrong.  I love a good tingling sensation.  But this meal was downright painful.  It burned going in, and it burned coming out.

Psycho Jim didn't study Korean.  Nor did he study math.  The Dragon Lady's concerned about his stress level.  Shooting that fire extinguisher is the smartest thing he's ever done.  In fact, his mother's so worried about his mental health that she doesn't make him do a darn thing.  That boy knows how to play the system.  I guess he'll marry a welfare queen and move into a trailer.

I watched another episode of Vikings.  Ragnar's fooling around on his wife.  He gets another woman pregnant.  Unfortunately, his young son witnesses his father's sinful ways.  The poor kid is very distraught about the whole situation.  It's Death of a Salesman set in medieval times.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Our Father on bended knees.  I was a little sad.  My fat buddy Dave is returning to the United States.  His plane is departing from Inchon in anther hour or so.  Dave's health is giving him trouble.  So he's throwing in the towel.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a hard time getting to sleep.  My allergies are killing me.  The peninsula has exploded with pollen.  Plus the yellow dust from the Gobi Desert has started to creep into the air.  My head is drowning in snot.

I woke up at 6 a.m.  I read the paper.  A doctor is Seoul strangled his pregnant wife.  He left her corpse in the bathtub.  The judge gave him twenty years in prison.

I turned on Fox News.  Charles Payne wants to investigate Americans on food stamps.  Notice how these crony capitalists never bring up corporate welfare?  Demonize the poor.  That's the name of the game.

Anyway, it's nearly 4 p.m.  I'm knackered.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Saturday

(The Muslims will eventually kill us all.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served pork and French fries for dinner.  Pork is a Smith family staple.  We'd never make it as Orthodox Jews.  Islam is also out of the question.  Fine by me.  Being a Semite is far too stressful.  Plus I've never enjoyed a desert climate.  Dry air saps my strength.

My wife's mother came to visit.  I call her the Queen Elephant.  She's a powerhouse.  Everyone is worried about Jim and the fire extinguisher.  The family believes he should see a head doctor.  Perhaps I'm a daddy in denial.  But my kid just doesn't have the kind of balls it takes to commit that type of vandalism.  No kidding.

I watched Breaking Bad.  I've seen the series a million times.  Yet the story of Walt the psychopathic meth dealer never fails to entertain me.  The program is my all-time favorite.  Watching a mild-mannered gentleman turn into a cold-blooded murderer is enthralling.  Hard-edged drama floats Smith's boat.

I prayed to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  Mankind needs God.  Without Him, we're nothing more than greedy killing machines. 

I went to be at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 7 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Ryu Hyunjin had a great outing against the New York Mets.  He's the real deal.  However, the chubby pitcher should stay away from the beer and the cigarettes.

I turned on Fox News.  Bill O'Reilly is angry that the Boston bombers are being humanized by the media.  I'm not in America, so I have no idea what's going on.  But I will tell you this.  Radical Islam will one day kill us all.  Wait till the rag-heads get their hands on weaponized smallpox.  We'll be murdered in our beds.

Anyway, it's nearly four p.m.  I'm knackered.  Plus my allergies are acting up.

Talk to you later.  God bless.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Friday

(The Children of the Rice love Psy.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served chili for dinner.  The meal wasn't very tasty.  It came from a can.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

My son didn't go to math class.  He's been expelled from his academy.  I no longer care.  Jim and I aren't very bright.  Dolphins could score higher on an algebra test.  We're a couple of morons.

I watched the second episode of The Bates Motel.  Norman has a handsome brother who's a disturbed troublemaker.  He probably sucks at algebra, too.  Norman also has a girlfriend with cystic fibrosis.  The series is quite good.  The characters are intriguing.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Our Father on bended knees.  Jesus instructs us how to pray.  He's very good at removing burdens.

I went to bed at 9 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Psy is flying to New York to promote his new single Gentleman.  My kids love the chubby singer.  They dance to his songs.

I turned on Fox News.  The Syrians are now using chemical weapons.  Looks like the United States will soon be embroiled in yet another war.  All the global defense contractors must be jumping up and down for joy.

It's currently 2 p.m.  Poor old Smith is knackered.  I desperately need a siesta.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Thursday

(I can't handle the truth.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served pork and egg rolls for dinner.  The sauce she used to smother the meat was filled with spice and peanuts.  Talk about delicious.  It was so strong that I felt like someone was stabbing my tongue with an ice-pick.  I love hot stuff.

Jim studied the fiendish Korean language with his mother.  He was on his best behavior.  She's still pretty pissed that he got expelled from his math academy.  But my wife is handling the situation better than me.  I'm baffled.  My kid isn't an aggressive boy.  I'm not getting the full story.

Asians are the best liars in the world.  No kidding.  And Jim has mastered the art of the half-truth from his relatives.  Being in the dark is for the birds.  I'm one of those idiots who demands the truth.

I downloaded six episodes of The Bates Motel.  The series is another winner.  It comes with the Smith Seal of Approval.  What the hell happened?  American television is now an art form.  Who would've ever guessed that such a wonderful renaissance would occur?  Not me.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Jesus tells us not to feel stress.  He says worrying won't add another minute to our lives.  He's absolutely right.  But stress just comes so naturally to us all.  A life without worry must be truly wonderful.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A lawmaker in Korea wants jail time for homosexuals.  The peninsula is very homophobic.  Being gay isn't easy in northeast Asia.  This is an extremely conservative part of the world.

I turned on Fox News.  The eldest Boston bomber used to collect welfare and food stamps.  It's legal for asylum seekers to get government benefits.  Cubans also qualify.

I feel a little sad.  I'm getting fat.  I can no longer squeeze into a size 36...in spite of all my exercise.  I'm currently 210 pounds.  Yes.  Smith is officially a disgusting fat body.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Wednesday

(The Big Bang Theory is good for a laugh.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served more cow bone soup for dinner.  The meal sucked ass.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

Jim got expelled from his math academy.  No kidding.  He shot off a fire extinguisher in one of the empty rooms.  The place was covered in gray foam by the time he got through.  The man who owns the school no longer wants to teach him.

I was very angry.  I threatened to punch Jim in the nose.  For a twelve-year-old boy to commit that type of vandalism is a very ballsy move.  I wish he were more timid.  Perhaps he'll start a new Asian crime family and have me whacked for poking my bony fingers in his face.

I watched The Big Bang Theory.  I was too upset to view drama.  My favorite character is Sheldon.  He's an obsessive-compulsive theoretical physicist at Cal Tech University.  Sheldon is smarter than a dolphin--which is more than you can say for me.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I prayed for forgiveness.  Makes sense.  I had just threatened to break my eldest son's nose.  Ain't there a law against such behavior?

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 5 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Manchester United won another championship.  I'm American.  I don't know much about soccer.  The game bores the shit out of me.

I turned on Fox News.  The Boston bombers are still being discussed.  The big question now is from whom did the brothers receive their training?  Mark my words.  Radical Islam will eventually kill us all.  I'd like nothing better than to say I told you so.  But unfortunately I'll be dead.  Lucky you.  

It's almost 5 p.m.  Poor old Smith is knackered.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Tuesday

(I'm dumber than a dolphin.)

Yesterday, I had strange Korean soup for dinner.  The main ingredient was the leg of a cow.  My vittles also came with rice and translucent noodles.  I didn't enjoy the meal.  The stew was just a little too ethnic for my taste.  But I kept my mouth shut.  

The Dragon Lady slaved and slaved to make that crap.  It literally took 24 hours to cook.  So what's a husband to do?  I ate as much as I could with a stupid-looking grin on my face.  I try not to complain.  Poor old Smith has a wonderful attitude.

My wife told me that the average IQ of a dolphin is 80.  I grew depressed.  My IQ is only 120. Perhaps I should be swimming in a tank at Sea World waiting for teenagers to throw me fish.

Jim studied Korean.  He didn't listen to a word his mother said.  But I kept my cool.  I feel sorry for Jim.  His father's as dumb as a freaking fish.  The poor child is screwed.  Sadly, the acorn doesn't fall far from the tree.

I watched Vikings.  This week's episode features lots and lots of human sacrifice.  No kidding.  Watching men being ritually murdered freaks me out.  Nevertheless, I highly recommend the series.  Vikings is unforgettable.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  Being a dirty nihilist isn't any fun.  Smith needs a code.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  

A seventy-year-old gentleman in Seoul kissed two elementary school girls on the cheek.  Then he told them that he loved them.  The police nailed the old bastard with a six thousand dollar fine.  Serves him right.  Keep your lips off the kiddies unless they're your grandchildren.

I turned on Fox News.  The Boston bombers are still capturing the headlines.  The youngest brother is alive.  He'll be tried in a federal court and given the death penalty.  

I'm against capital punishment--even for dirty Muslim terrorists.  Rough justice is an evolutionary hangover.  Plus the sinners aren't afforded the proper time required to repent for their misdeeds.

Remember this, my friends.  Moses, King David, and Saint Paul have one thing in common.  They're murderers who atoned for their crimes.  The Lord loves us all--even the bloodstained.  

It's almost five p.m.  I'm knackered.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Sunday

(Bacon and eggs!  I'll give you bacon and eggs!)

Yesterday, I had a strong hankering for egg rolls.  So the Dragon Lady gave me bacon and eggs instead.  She often plays little tricks in order to spite her husband.  Life is a power struggle on every level.

But I didn't take the bait.  I just smiled and ate my vittles like a true gentleman.  I'm wonderful that way.  Sometimes I envy serial killers.  It must feel great to administer twisted psychopathic justice without feeling overwhelming guilt.

This is how I imagine it:

"Bacon and eggs!  I'll give you bacon and eggs!  Now bring me my egg rolls before I use that skillet to bash your brains in!"

This is what actually happens:

"Bacon and eggs?"

Stern look from wife.

"Boy, the meal  looks delicious."  Big toothy smile.  "Thank you so much.  I'm lucky to have you in my life."

I held a Vikings marathon.  I downloaded all seven episodes.  Then I watched them consecutively.  The series is fascinating.  The primitive Nordic men remind me of a modern day criminal motorcycle gang.  The strong survive and the weak are sacrificed.  Yes.  Social Darwinism at its smelliest.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Jesus was beaten half to death.  Then the Roman and Jewish powers-that-be nailed him to a cross.  He rose three days later.  So I try my best to do what he tells me.

I went to bed at 2 a.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 11 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper. 

Some Koreans believe that they will face terrorism in the future. The attacks won't come from the north.  Rather the violence will be a product of alienated multicultural children.  No kidding.

The article is shocking.  But I'm not offended.  Koreans are extremely xenophobic and often swim in a sea of ignorance.  Why let their stupidity weigh on my overly sensitive girly heart?

I turned on Fox News.  Ann Coulter thinks the surviving Boston bomber should be tried by a military court.  I don't understand her thinking.  I'm completely convinced that many far-right conservatives want to live in a police state.

It's one p.m.  Time for church.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Saturday

(Mads Mikkelson is the new Hannibal.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady made spicy pork and egg rolls for dinner.  The meal was delicious.  The meat was flaming hot.  Plus the egg rolls came as a pleasant surprise.  My wife doesn't serve them much these days.

Jim was in a good mood.  His school took him on a field trip.  He spent the day walking around some museum.  Then he flew a kite at a local park.

Bluce enjoyed the PlayStation.  He's still enthralled with college football.  The kid is quite talented.  He defeated Auburn to win the SEC crown. 

Bluce is only five.  I'm hoping med school is in his future.  My family is in desperate need of a doctor.

I watched Hannibal.  Talk about outstanding.  Mads Mikkelson is the lead actor.  His accent is creepy.  His face is creepy.  His posture is creepy.  His wardrobe is creepy.  Even his strange name is creepy.  Mads is just an all around spooky guy.  He's perfect for the part.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  After all, I'm not some filthy atheist.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  Korean protestants are blocking gay marriage.  The peninsula is very conservative.  Even pornography is outlawed.

I turned on Fox News.  The Boston bombers have been brought to justice.  One is dead while the other is in serious condition at a local hospital.  They're both followers of Islam.  What a shocker.

I didn't exercise today.  It's pissing rain.  I'm freezing.  What I need is a hot cup of tea.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Friday

(Vikings:  Floki is quite the savage.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served pork ribs for dinner.  They were smothered in barbecue sauce.  The meal was tasty.  I like barbecue sauce.  Good food brings a smile to my face.

My youngest son Bluce is very smart.  He set up the Sony PlayStation.  Then he beat the Georgia Bulldogs in college football.  Bluce has his own team.  He made the stadium himself.

Jim lied to his mother.  The boy needed a break from practicing the fiendish Korean tongue.  So he told her he had to study for a science test.  She knew he was lying.  But she let it go.  I'm afraid that woman is becoming soft.  She'll have to toughen up.  I want Jim to attend med school.

I watched Vikings.  Floki is my favorite character.  He enjoys murdering innocent people in order to enrich himself and his friends.  I'd have never made it as a viking.  I'm too much of a pussy.  Fighting is for the birds.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  And why not?  Jesus protects weaklings like me from predators like Floki.  No kidding.  Think about it.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 5:30 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A man in Seoul got caught stealing from several of his neighbors.  He sold their stuff in order to pay for plastic surgery.  He's ashamed of his overbite.

I turned on Fox News.  The feds released a video of their two prime suspects.  FBI stands for Freaking Ball-breaking Idiots.  Remember Richard Jewel?  How about Ruby Ridge?  Take everything you hear with a grain of salt.  Those clowns seldom get anything right.

It's almost two p.m.  I'm knackered.  Perhaps I need some pumpkin pie.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Thursday

(Explosion in Waco.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served Hormel chili for dinner.  The meal wasn't very tasty.  In fact, it came from a can.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles.  I'm wonderful that way.

Jim studied the fiendish Korean tongue with his mother.  She forces him to read the language for an hour a day.  Then they review comprehension questions together.  He must have done a great job.  He didn't receive his usual beating at her beastly hands.  Good for him.

I watched Supernatural.  I enjoy the series.  But I must tell the truth.  Season eight just isn't doing it for me.  Perhaps my expectations are too high.  Bennie the vampire is a dud.  It's time for Sam to cut his head off already.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  Why babble like a pagan?  Keep it short, to the point, and private.  Those instructions come straight from the mouth of Jesus himself.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A man in Seoul was arrested for murder.  He killed his wife's lover with an air gun.  He had to shoot the victim four times before the poor bastard surrendered the ghost.  What a shitty way to die.  Real painful.

I turned on Fox News.  A fertilizer factory outside of Waco, Texas blew up.  Dozens of people might be dead.  The explosion is suspicious.  April 20th marks the anniversary of the FBI's major screw up which sent scores of innocent women and children to their premature graves.  How those men can sleep at night is beyond me.

It's  4:30 p.m.  Poor old Smith is knackered.  I might go for a walk to get rid of some stress.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Wednesday

(Jeremy Irons has a lot of talent.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served spicy pork and rice for dinner.  The meal was good.  The meat burned a hole right through my tongue.  I actually thought the pain would never go away.  Wow.  I love hot stuff.

I watched The Borgias.  The series is a Showtime production featuring Jeremy Irons.  He stars as the pope.  Irons is a great actor.  He's lost none of his chops.

Jim studied math for three hours at his academy.  Then he practiced the fiendish Korean tongue with his mother.  He did great.  Consequently, my wife wasn't forced to beat him with the Spoon of Justice.  The boy compliantly did as he was told...similar to a Nazi.  Perhaps we're raising a future fascist dictator.  Oh well.  A job's a job.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  The bible is a strange spooky tome.  The coming of Jesus is predicted way back in Genesis 3.  His crucifixion is foreshadowed in Psalm 22--a thousand years before the actual event.  How's that for eerie?

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  A businessman got fined 60 thousand dollars for opening a lingerie bar in Seoul.  The peninsula is very conservative and sexually repressed.  Even porno is outlawed.  That's why prostitution has been thriving here for thousands of years.  Paying to get one's rocks off is very common.

I turned on Fox News.  The FBI is still hunting for the Boston bomber.  I bet it's a Pakistani with a green card.  He probably found out that one of his relatives got blown to bits in a drone strike.  Now he wants payback.  This war against terror will end up killing us all.  Mark my words.

It's almost 5 p.m.  I'm chewing on a pencil and writing in this stupid blog.  Poor old Smith is knackered.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Tuesday

(John the Baptist:  God's will is God's will.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served beef and French fries for dinner.  She prepared the meal in our magnificent Phillips air-fryer.  Cooking with hot air produces very little grease.  I guess that's healthy.  I really don't know.

Jim studied the fiendish Korean tongue with his mother.  He's a brilliant speaker.  But his reading and writing skills are still sub-par.  She gave him several stiff whacks with the Spoon of Justice. Jim hates to study.  So my wife must beat the love of education into the boy on a nightly basis.  Good for her.  Knowledge is power.

I watched Game of Thrones.  Episode three is fantastic.  Jamie gets his hand cut off by a group of brigands.  They sever his appendage with a long nasty-looking blade.  Good stuff.

I paid homage to Christ.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  Remember this, my friends.  God's will is God's will.  It can't be stopped.  Herod thought he could change history by beheading John the Baptist.  And we all know how that turned out.  My humble advice?  Get with the program.  Repent.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  The Korean government is keeping a close eye on foreign sex offenders.  The peninsula is very xenophobic.  Most of us foreigners are as clean as the newly fallen snow.  They'd be better served observing domestic sex offenders.

I switched on Fox News.  There was a terrorist attack in Boston.  So far, three people--including an eight-year-old boy--have been killed.  Countless others are injured.  Muslims!  Those towel-headed camel-jockeys will be the death of us all.  Wait till they get their hands on weaponized smallpox.  I don't even want to think about it.

It's almost four p.m.  I'm knackered.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless. 

Monday, April 15, 2013

Monday

(Benny's OK.  But I still miss Dick.)

Yesterday, I took the family to church.  The driving was crazy.  I said the f-word on several occasions.  I'm quite ashamed of my limited vocabulary.  Poor old Smith is lewd and crude.

Perhaps I'm a racist.  But Asians don't belong behind the wheel.  Their cars should immediately be confiscated and replaced with gentle elderly ponies.  So let it be written, so let it be done.

The pastor did a wonderful job.  He's an intellectual from Yale.  We're still studying Exodus.  Pharaoh tries to compromise with God.  He refuses to completely obey and humble himself before the commands of the Lord. 

I'm the same way.  I often render half a loaf to the Almighty instead of giving my full effort.  I need to become a better human being.  However, I'm not holding my breath.  My demons have demons.

I watched Supernatural.  The boys are now hanging out with a vampire named Benny.  I enjoy the series.  But I still miss Dick.  He was such a great villain.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Our Father on bended knees.  I refuse to babble like a pagan.

I went to bed at 11 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m.  I drank coffee and read the paper.  More single women are leaving their newborns at churches and hospitals.  Unmarried mothers are severely ostracized here on the peninsula.

I turned on Meet the Press.  Mark Rubio was the guest.  He has a new immigration plan.  I felt sleepy.  I didn't listen intently to the interview.

It's almost 8 p.m.  I'm tired.

Anyway, talk to you later.  God bless.